Garfield likes Lasgana
by CaveArt
Summary: Follow Garfield as he survives through his wacky adventures!
1. Chapter 1

Garfield's soft, fluffy paws lightly scraped the top of the creamy lasagna. A quiet purr came out of his curled lips in excitement. He crept closer and opened his wide mouth to absorb the decadent noodle meat dish. A squeaky high-pitched yell came from ack tall lanky human, with the name of John.

"Garfield! You have gotten to be the size of a balloon! We are taking you to the vet!" I screeched in horror as I hurled my muscular body towards the ignorant human. I hit the cold floor, and everything went black.

I woke up in an unfamiliar place with harsh lights blinding my bright green eyes.

"John why?" I asked while he carried me into a small room labeled, "Liz"

"Hello, John." A familiar woman's voice came out of a woman human.

"You're taking good care of your cat, but watch out." She looked at me and poked me, making me uncomfortable.

"Why?" John said looking dreamily into the she-devil's eyes.

"He's fat John, too fat to be good." I hurled myself at John's head and clawed at his hair.

"Don't listen to her!" I screeched "She's a quick, cover your ears!"

"Alright, so let's just give him a healthy diet plan, and have another check in, in about three months?"

I stopped in my tracks. A diet? I fell to the floor in despair.

END OF CHAP 1


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, I sat in utter dismay at my newfound torture. Despite my sobbing, John continued to make my first (and possibly last) meal. It was a can of food shaped like a plus sign, and the contents inside were truly disgraceful. A solid block of what looked like meat slid into my food dish with a slurp.

"You don't expect me to eat this do you?" I batted the food with my paw, which did nothing to change its shape.

"Come on Gar. Why don't you eat it?" John slid the food closer to me, and I sprinted up the stairs with a valiant yell. As I slipped under the bed, a large creature burbled and edged closer to the bed. I bounded from under the bed to see a giant meat monster holding the mutt and the food giver!

"Eat me, or they will pay..." The monster's voice trailed off into a gurgling laugh.

"Never!" The thought trailed through my mind and I got more worried by the millisecond.

"Well, then you'll never see your precious food again!" Meat monster's words played in slow motion inside my brain. Without even thinking, my legs forced me towards the foodie and my mouth opened. I launched myself and ate the monster in one giant gulp. I fell to the ground and began to cry warm, bubbling tears.

"That was really bad, I would eat Odie over that."

"Garfield, you saved us!" John lifted me up for a hug, followed by a scratch from my wolverine-like claws.

"I'm sorry I made you try and eat that, you will never eat that, or have a diet ever again!" I did my victory screech and ran to bed to take a cat nap. But as I sobered up the stairwell, I woke up in my bed. It seemed it was all just a good dream, and I was back in a nightmare.


	3. Chapter 3

Rebel Odie ferociously shoved me off my bed and slobbered all over my gentle face.

"I should kick this mut into orbit." I valiantly stated. Odie stupidly barked and bounded out the room. Suddenly, there was a loud series of bumps.

"Odie fell down the stairs again!" I shouted to the food provider John. My lips curled into a smile just because of the thought of pain being inflicted on that devil dog.

"Not again!" The tall man sighed. He sluggishly scooted to the door, picked Odie up, and cradled him like a newborn baby human.

"That's an ugly man-child." Lasagna buyer did not like my retort. He used his death stare at me.

"Don't make me feed you that slop again." Shivers rushed down my spine and made the hair on my back stick up.

"Such an evil being. No wonder nobody except us knows you exist." His face turned red like the sauce in my favorite dish.

"That's it! I have spent years feeding you and loving you, and all you do is complain! I am done with you Garfield; I am taking you to the animal shelter across the road!"

"What? John you know I was kidding, right? It's for the audien-"

"Enough! I don't care about the people in your head watching us, I don't want to do this but I must. Now get in the cage." I was cornered. Even my enemy Odie was frozen at the sight of me vamoosing. I hissed as the beast lunged at me.

"Gotch Ya!" He yanked my tail and threw me in the metal prison.

"You sick and evil man!" Wet slimy tears ran down my mouth, (I was hungry) as I yelled at him to reconsider.

"No Gar. It's either you or me."


	4. Chapter 4

furious and tired, I slumped into a soft blanket in the enclosure. John struggled to carry me and violently pulled me into the yellow slug bug. I screeched for odie to save me but forgot he was stupid and didn't understand any language. He waddled over to the car and jumped onto Johns lap.

"You disobeying scum! I thought you were better than this!" I hissed at Odie. He now lost any trust I had left, and if I got out, my valiant war cry would be the last thing he heard. The car abruptly stopped at a worn-down shelter. In big letters, a sign read, "Alans Pet Prison." I knew it was a jail. John lugged me out into the evil building and opened the door. A fat man laughed at a small bunny as he hurled into a hole in the wall named, "The Happy Palace." Oh lord lasagna gives me strength I whispered as John dropped my cage and ran.

"Hey! Why'd you give me this ugly cat? You need to- oh well. I won't say no to fresh meat." His smile curled into an evil grin as he chuckled and examined my wonderful fisique. I growled like a ferocious beast and startled the fatty. He screamed and grabbed me out of my cadge and hurled me into The Happy Palace.

"Have mercy!" I yelled as I fell down the pit and landed with an oof. It was dark, and I had to turn on my cat night vision. I pretended to be in a spy movie and jumped around singing my theme music. I bumped into a fuzzy wall.

"What," I said as the wall moved farther away.

"Come back! I could eat you!" I was ravenous and if something were breathing, I would eat it. Suddenly, a bright light shined over my head, and I could make out moving blobs.

"Take the newbie to the playpen."


	5. Chapter 5

I wailed for some hero to save me from the animal hell. I peered over my shoulder and noticed there were pets of all backgrounds, but mostly ugly dogs.

"You beasts let me go!" I batted at their eyes like a piece of string until they threw me into a small enclosure made of colored fences. No animal was inside, they were all watching me from the outside.

"Can't do that buddy. You need to fight for your freedom!" He said like a gameshow host. All the animals went wild, reverting to their primitive ways. A small, grey tinted cat jumped into the ring and got into a battle stance. His collar said Nermal on it.

"Whoh there bucko, I'm not the fighting type, more of a strong and silent type." I got backed into a pink fence. Dammit I was cornered. He barked.

"Well if I have to I will. How hard will it be to beat this malnourished ugly version of me?" Nermals lips curled into a wicked smile. He began to wag his tail back and forth in a propeller motion. His once fluffy tail turned into a razor-sharp fan blade.

"Never mind. Hasta La Vista baby!" I tried to climb out of the arena but failed and landed on my glorious gluteus maximus.

"Never underestimate me fatso." Said the fuzzy fan blade.

"Never call me fat!" I yelled as my true form began to seep out.


	6. Chapter 6

Exotic pets cawed and screeched as my body began to become larger and more muscular. I yelled as my flowing blond hair protruded out of my head and made spikes. Nermal stepped back where I once was, and I quickly cornered him.

"Pw-Pwease no! I'm just a cwute kat!"

"Don't take my kindness for weakness. The beast in me is sleeping, not dead." I lurched towards the grey abomination and clawed in every direction. Sparks flew from my paws and bolted towards the brat cat.

"Ahhhh! I'm two ywong to dwie!"

"Too late." With a final blow, I made a gash in his dirty stomach. But as I swiped, his form distorted and wavered.

"Il get wo u stwupid kat! Iwl always bwe wone swep ahwead!" As he said this, he disappeared into fine dust.

"Dammit. Just a hologram, I should have known." I wandered over to the other beasts.

"Why? Why would you do this to an innocent house cat?" All of them stood quiet but one.

"We've always done this whenever a new pet comes in, please don't take it personally."

"Whats your name?" A small blue cat sobered up to me and curled around me.

"The names Blue. Yours?"

"Garfield. I'm Garfield."


	7. Chapter 7

Lost and so very alone, I poured my heart and soul into my tale of adventure. After a 20-hour sonnet of my life, I sobered over to an extra-large cat bed and spread my voluptuous lumps into the soft plushy cushion. All the feeble animals looked in amazement as I towered over them. I felt like a king, no, like a god. I cleared my throat and began to speak.

"As your new leader, I declare war on Nermal and all his minions. His actions are unforgivable, and he must be punished." All the pets cheered in agreement, except for one.

"We don't do leaders here." Blue jumped from the wave of pets and rushed to face me.

"If that's so we're gonna have a problem. Throw her into the dungeon." She hissed and tried to run away, but the Garfield army was too fast. They grabbed her and tossed Blue into a small opening where a sink used to be.

"Not so powerful now you little cat that reminds me of Monday." I chuckled as I threw a switch and closed the hatch above the dungeon. I was now their ruler. I didn't need John. I had my own army at my disposal, and I had a lot of work to do.


End file.
